I was so excited about my 5th birthday party… I couldn’t sleep. I was so nervous that when the day finally arrived, I had a complete meltdown during the party. I ruined it.
But lately, the snaps undo too easily…
I can come into a room and lead a group through facilitation and wear the mask of confidence – and indeed I do feel a great real joy doing the work – but inside, inside I am crumbling. I wish I didn’t feel guilty for taking up space. At the grocery store cashier lineup, the…
Something amiss.
I am tired. So tired. But strangely energized. I am sad. So sad. But I lie here with a tearful smile of contentment. I am achy. So achy. But walk with a spring in my step. I feel something amiss, but I am fulfilled. I could burst into tears. My cat pokes my belly that’s…
The Varied Thrush.
Found on the front steps of building at corner of Barclay and Gilford, West End, Vancouver. Pencil crayon, watercolour, dry pastel on newsprint. “Dead voices, lost sounds, forgotten noises, vibrations lockstepping into the abyss and now too distant ever to be recaptured! … What sort of arrows would be able to transfix such birds?” —…
… right to be angry…
“Every little creature has a right to be angry. – Little My, Moominpappa at Sea (1965), Tove Jansson
Frog moth studies
Scene from Twin Peaks: The Return, Episode 8
TECKNA MÅLA. My father’s art supplies.
My father, Roar Thorsen (1930-2012), was my first art teacher. I grew up with his paintings on our walls, his meticulous scrapbooks/photo albums, his continuous creative process. In 1976 (we were back living in Sweden), my father taught me oil painting and he gave me his paint box, and easel from the 50’s and 60’s, and…
There is an intoxicating self-indulgence in allowing myself to whine here.
July 22, 2021 Dear me, This is my S.A.D. time. Seasonal Affective Disorder is not about winter and sun lamps for me. I struggle in the summer with sunshine and these inevitable depressions. The low mood cycle has been particularly hard this past while. I am finding it hard to focus. There is energy,…
Slowing down the creative process
Drawing a dead bird from “life.” (It was actually caught by my indoor cat through a small opening in my apartment window on Sept 23, 2018, and unfortunately it was very dead, so I photographed it and buried it in Stanley Park) A resurgence of studying art history and techniques has made me realize I…
Alone time in my “backyard.”
My social anxiety is at a great height these days as I navigate all-sorts in my life. So I savour alone time and nature in my “backyard.” Today’s lagoon walk sightings and sounds included: Starlings, Crows, Sparrows, Pigeons, Herons, Wrens, Squirrels, Ducks and ducklings- mallards, wood ducks, Canada geese and goslings, Raccoons, Thrush songs, Robin songs, Eagle songs, Bugs, Dragonflies- so many! Skimmers, darners, damsel flies. Red, white tail,…
What’s the question?
I wrote in my journal this morning- “At the end of the weekend – if I stay quiet – an answer will come.” But I’m not sure what the question is! What we’re really afraid of is to be in life, in step with it and not a step ahead of it, trying to control…
… to thrive as an artist…
From Lucia Joyce- To Dance in the Wake by Carol Loeb Shloss “In short, they were nice women, versions of the angel in the house, that perilously good creature that Virginia Woolf commemorated as Mrs. Ramsay in To the Lighthouse. It is relevant to Lucia’s story to remember that Woolf knew she had to “kill”…
“Stanislaw K. was born in Poland…” Ward notes.
Graphic novel experiments. Pencil crayon, watercolour, ink, coffee, embroidery on newsprint
Bound Heron. (imagined) Part 1
Currently embroidery: Process continues…
Dead Bird Study Part 2
See: Part 1 PART 2: Watercolour, pencil crayon, ink, coffee, beet juice, salt, on newsprint, embroidery. Next up in Part 3 – add writing.
Dead Bird Study Part 1
Watercolour, pencil crayon, ink, coffee, salt on newsprint. Next up: embroidery.
Decomposition study- the mouse. Part 3 of 3
See: Decomposition study Part 1 Decomposition study Part 2 Decomposition study Part 3: Natural watercolours by Caitlin Ffrench, ink, coffee, salt, embroidery thread, vintage beads and fabric.
Decomposition study- the mouse, part 1.
Using embroidery on the drawing to emulate decomposition and nature “taking back”:
Imagined Bird Nest Part 3 of 3 #embroidereddrawing
Check out: Imagined Bird Nest Part 1 Imagined Bird Nest Part 2 IMAGINED BIRD NEST PART 3 of 3:
Imagined Bird Nest Part 2
Check out: Imagined Bird Nest Part 1 Imagined Bird Nest Part 2: